Teenagers to vote via TikTok button, government announces
13–19-year-olds to receive free smartphone, provided they vote responsibly (i.e. Labour)
In a groundbreaking effort to modernise democracy and secure the youth vote, Labour has announced that teenagers will now be able to cast their ballots via TikTok.
Under the new scheme, all 13–19-year-olds will be issued a free smartphone preloaded with the official VoteLabour app, alongside a selection of branded Labour filters and a compulsory 3-minute explainer on why Reform UK is fascist.
Voting will involve double-tapping the party’s latest thirst trap or swiping right on a looped video of Keir Starmer nodding solemnly to Billie Eilish.
“It’s about giving young people a voice,” said a government spokesperson, “as long as they use it to say the right things.”
To ensure voting integrity, users who attempt to support the wrong party will receive a trigger warning and be redirected to a 12-part TikTok series titled “Why Conservatism Is a Hate Crime.”
The Electoral Commission confirmed that all votes will be verified by algorithm, vibes, and approval from the Labour Youth Council.
Failure to vote correctly may result in revoked phone privileges and compulsory re-education via a sponsored trip to Glastonbury.