BBC Comes Out as Non-Binary: “We No Longer Identify as Impartial”
Viewers urged to respect the BBC’s truth journey and not misgender its news output.
LONDON: In a landmark announcement timed to coincide with International Non-Binary People’s Day, the BBC has officially declared itself non-binary, describing the move as “a bold step away from outdated notions like objectivity, neutrality, and the Oxford comma.”
The decision was announced during a special Newsnight segment performed entirely through slam poetry and non-verbal gesturing.
“We’re proud to say we no longer identify as impartial,” said BBC Diversity Tsar, Poppy Gloss-Wintour (they/it). “For too long, the BBC was shackled by binary concepts like ‘truth’ and ‘falsehood’. Now, we embrace a more fluid, lived-experience-based editorial framework.”
In internal documents leaked to The Yookay Review, producers are now required to run every news script through the “Perspective Prism™” — a new tool that filters facts through three layers of identity validation, one sensitivity consultant, and a feelings barometer calibrated to TikTok trends.
“Reporting both sides is violent,” said senior editor Tarquin Fluorescence. “Sometimes one side is just wrong. And the other is vibing.”
The rebrand includes:
Weather forecasts replaced by mood boards
Political coverage labelled “lived experience commentary”
The Six O’Clock News replaced by “The 6 O’Clock Feeling”
The BBC's iconic logo will also be updated. The new design features three softly pulsating blobs in the colours of the non-binary flag, accompanied by the slogan: “Braver, Bolder, Compassionate.”
Reaction has been mixed.
Media watchdogs expressed concern, with Ofcom warning that “licence fee payers may be confused when the BBC simultaneously identifies as both state broadcaster and revolutionary art collective.”
Meanwhile, Labour praised the announcement, with Sir Keir Starmer describing the move as “a brave and inclusive step towards a society where even reality itself feels safe.”